My apologies, four people who ever have or perhaps ever will comment on this blog: I’m getting a ridiculous number of spam comments so I’m modifying the comment settings a bit.  It’s supposed to post your comments immediately if you have ever commented before, but your comment may get held for moderation.  This should kill off spammers but be a slight unfriendliness to actual humans occasionally.

Hey also, I move into my new house Monday.  I’ll endeavor to share some pictures and generally keep you posted.

The internet has waited long enough for a review of all Chocobo Theme songs.  Luckily the internet has prepared a video just for this purpose.

Section 1. Comments.

FFII.  Simple and jangly.  The basic awesome melody is there with few extras.  But definitely sowing the seeds of greatness.  This is the work of a budding genius.  I imagine this as the Chocobo Band’s first album, recorded for $700 over a weekend in a garage.

FFIII.  Actually a downgrade from II.  I think maybe they didn’t know what they had on their hands.  Sounds like they tried to go lo-fi and work just on the melody. Perhaps some music intern took over or it was overlooked by an unconscientious producer.

FFIV.  Here’s where things take off.  I’m pretty sure this was my first exposure, in the American “FFII”.  The tune has been filled out and grown into something special.

FFV. Some kind of tropical remix.  It’s a little goofy, but I appreciate where they’re coming from and it keeps its essence.

FFVI.  Brilliant.  The Chocobo Theme at its self-aware peak.  Someone lovingly crafted this who knew their way around a Chocobo Theme.  The sparse melody has been fully realized and built into a colossally layered electronic beast.

FFVII. A kinder, gentler Chocobo Theme.  I’m not sure of the context here–were the Chocobos drugged?  Or were they shooting for a gentle denounement from the glory of FFVI?

FFVIII.  Another where I wonder if I’m missing some context.  If I had to guess, I’d say this is heard when the hero discovers a playable version of FFII in an old barn.

FFIX. Are all the Chocobos old in this one?  You can’t ride a Chocobo to this music.  You put it out to pasture and start explaining to the kids that Old Chocy might not be with us much longer.

FFX. Complete unrecognizable and hideous. Is this a bad Saturday morning cartoon theme?  This is some kind of crime.

FFXI. Something about this one is a little off.  I like the idea but it’s oddly out of tune.  Or they’re meddling with the formula.

FFXII. Pretty great, ambitious orchestral version.  A true revival.  Complex and mature.  Kudos.

Section 2. Rank. Subjective but undoubtedly correct.

  1. FFVI
  2. FFIV
  3. FFII
  4. FFXII
  5. FFVII
  6. FFV
  7. FFIX
  8. FFIII
  10. FFXI
  11. FFX

Section 3. Actual research*.

Composers: Nobuo Uematsu has sole credit for the score in games II-IX. FFX and FFXI have two other co-composers and FFXII is entirely some others. I also found out that there is a whole Chocobo video game series in which the music is composed by one of the FFX composers.  Considering FFX has the worst Chocobo theme, I’m not as excited about this as I should be.

*I’m going to go ahead and assume that wikipedia is crushingly accurate when it comes to video game information and not check any other sources.  Wikipedia also makes it clear that I have a lot to learn about the Chocobo Theme

A consequence of buying a house is that my sense of what constitutes “expensive” is totally out of whack.

Context: we talked about getting a gas oven.  We don’t need this per se, but would like it, and figure it’s a good investment to get something really good that will be used daily.  The stove that comes with the house is electric, and has the coils.  I’ve had a glasstop stove for a while, so it’s a downgrade.  No one has ever endorsed the coils as the premier surface for cooking and easy cleanup.

Anyway, normally a $1200 purchase (plus or minus) would be a significant expense and I’d do a lot of research first and probably put it off for a while just to let the sticker shock settle in.  But when you’re already committed to a house like ours, $1200 is like a 0.5% extra expense.  It feels like practically nothing.  It’s NOT, of course.  It’s $1200.  It’s more than a week’s work.  But then again, the house itself will cost me 30 YEARS of work. Will I be mad, when I’m 63, that I can’t retire on Friday because I bought that stove in 2010, so I have to wait until next Friday instead? Gosh, I hope not.

I posted on twitter that I have the hearing of a 16-year-old and the eyesight of a 50-year-old.  I picked those ages somewhat arbitrarily, but genuinely trying to guess my age equivalencies.  It occurred to me later that my actual age is precisely halfway in between those two ages.  (Determining the numerical value is an exercise left to the reader.)  It’s a little weird to think I’m as close to 50 as I am to 16.  Sixteen kinda seems like a long time ago, but then again, it kinda doesn’t.

Totally unrelated, some items of interest:

*The Chilean earthquake actually shortened days on Earth. Wow.

*I’ve been obsessed with this video since lambwaffle shared it.

*A croquet set.  I am considering leaving a fake review suggesting shoppers look for something of higher quality. Also: laser mallets!