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Editorial Errors Made Elsewhere on This Site
I did not, as it was originally printed, "win an Academy Award." It was actually a Tony.
I am not "angry about hats."
I am not the Pope's "archnemesis."
I never "tried to sell my sister."
I am not really a "human computer." My bionic attachments merely provide me with exception physical strength and leaping abilities, not improved mental capacity.
I did not "open a successful chain of candle and herbal fragrance shops." However, I was kicked out of a similar establishment once.
I have never "pole vaulted seventeen feet."
I did not "save with MCI."
Not actually "gifted with superhuman strength," I did not "establish the American Clean and Jerk record at the age of fourteen."
I do not "fear the wrath of a vengeful god of fire."
I no longer "harbor a mysterious yet overpowering odor." (That I am aware of.)
I only rarely "leave my house."
I did not "invent plutonium." Its existence was bound to be discovered eventually due to the inherent nature of atomic structures. So it could not precisely be "invented." I was merely the first to synthesize it.
I am not "the only man to defeat Chess Grandmaster Garry Kasparov." Apparently Anatoly Karpov has also beaten him.
I am not "confined to a clear plastic cell to prevent further mayhem."
Finally, although I never technically "struck out Barry Bonds with three straight pitches," I would have if the plate umpire had been calling the outside corner.
2003 BuriedintheNoise.com
Permission for reproduction will be granted if you ask nicely.