Why did you do it?

Okay, I concede. Perhaps I could have avoided crashing the bus or uprooting all those trees. But if it meant the completion of the task, then I would have made the same decisions. Is the goal not more important than the means? It’s not like those buildings were going to stand forever anyway. It’s not like that immigrant’s newsstand isn’t replaceable.

Listen, someone had to do it, and if it’s going to be me then it’s going to be done my way. You call it senseless destruction, I call it playing by my own rules. You call it being reckless, I call it the action of a take-charge modern-day hero who won’t back down from anyone. You call those priceless works of art irreplaceable treasures, I call them paintings, lady. We can throw together some new sketches, for christ’s sake. Okay, maybe I could have saved them. Like I deliberately threw them in the East River.

But you know, when a man of action is at work, petty details like pedestrian safety don’t matter that much. Not when they’re part of the overall sacrifice to reach an important shared goal. At the time, I was simply concentrating on what I was doing and if it was going to get done, then I felt like these were acceptable losses. Yes, all six city blocks. Not one block less. And yes, the box of kittens, too.

All right. You got me there. I know that vaporizing the final original copy of the Constitution probably was unnecessary. Ashcroft’s pretty much made it moot anyway, you know. And my setting all those fires was really more for getting attention and didn’t accomplish much of anything aside from inspiring terror.

But now, finally, someone steps up and just gets it done. Now we never have to worry about it again. And to get it done as effectively as I did it…and you’re asking why?

Thanks to the Missoula Colony!

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