Accurate Whole Foods slogan:

Welcome to Whole Foods! We are immediately dispatching someone to get in your goddamn way

Actually though I just bought lunch there and since today’s choice was a big pile o’ kale salad I also allowed myself a cookie. I put a single cookie in a bakery takeaway bag. If I have too many treats sitting around my workspace I make poor lifestyle choices, so Just One it would be. The cashier felt my timid acquisition of a lone cookie so sorry that she just tossed it in my bag and didn’t charge me for it. So, also maybe:

Welcome to Whole Foods! Where pity will get you a free cookie